Hippos & Zippos

 

Coworker Nicknames ....

Coworker Nicknames

Motion light - Only works when someone walks past.

Justin - Does just enough not to get fired.

007 - 0 motivation, 0 skills, 7 bathroom breaks.

Butter knife - not the sharpest tool in the shed.

Moe - Slow like molasses.

ET - just wants to go home. 

Splinter - annoying little pr*ck gets under your skin.

Lantern - not very bright and needs to be carried. 

Deckchair - buckles under pressure. 

Gone fishing - those who lure their co-workers' attention away with lame jokes.

Die Faks

 

#lekkerafrikaans beesblaas

#lekkerafrikaans streepsak

#lekkerafrikaans kotteljons

#lekkerafrikaans karmenaadjie

Elemelons

 

What, You Egg? (He Stabs Him)

 

“The only intelligent tactical response to life’s horror is to laugh defiantly at it” ― Søren Kierkegaard

Springmielies en kie

 

Groepe

 

Simposium, Koos du Plessis

 

Hanlon's razor

Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity.
                                                                 —Hanlon's razor

Willem Wikkelspies

#lekkerafrikaans Skaamkwaad

#lekkerafrikaans Lostrap

Alternatief vir kleitrap

#lekkerafrikaans Wikwakke

'n beter woord vir reenveers

#lekkerafrikaans Binnepret

Ingenieursterme

 

ghotI'

Question How do you pronounce the word: ghotI' ?
Answer fish

ghotI' is klingon for fish (check it out - use an online translator).

But take this into account:

• GH - Use the pronunciation from the word tough (f)
• O - Use the pronunciation from the word woman (i)
• TI - Use the pronunciation from the word motion (sh)

Hoe lank is dit?

Vra gerus

You might feel dumb asking questions, but you look dumber when you don't get it because you failed to ask.

2020....

Die Bus

Wanneer jy die kleine baba vashou, sit jy in Die Bus se bestuurdersitplek. Jy bestuur Die Bus. Met die eerste paar verjaardae bly jy op die sitplek, en bestuur Die Bus. Dan raak hulle laat laerskool. Jy sit dan op die eerste bank net agter die bestuurdersitplek van Die Bus. Jy kan nog aan die skouer vat, in die oor fluister van die nuwe bestuurder van Die Bus. Daarna raak dit net erger, met elke verjaar skuif jy 'n sitplek agtertoe. Met die 18e een sit jy in die agterbank. Jy dink en voel jy moet nog Die Bus bestuur, maar die woorde kom nie altyd deur na die bestuurder nie. Jy is eintlik nog verantwoordelik vir Die Bus. Versekering en al. Maar jy bestuur Die Bus deur iemand anders. Jy hoop hardop dat jy 'n goeie joppie daarvan gemaak het. Daarna laai Die Bus jou af. Jy kry miskien 'n kans deur die venster van Die Bus om nog iets te vra, te se^. Dalk net via WhatsApp. Hierdie Bus loop nou sy eie paaie, jy voel jy moet hom nog bestuur en moet nog in beheer wees, maar jy is nie. Dit is moeilik. 

Miseries

Hoekom is dit hoendervleis en nie gans bompies nie?

2050 is nou nader as 1990...

2050 is nou nader as 1990...

Algebra

(Para)normal

What do you call a puppy Miniature Schnauzer? A Schnitzel.

What do you call a puppy Miniature Schnauzer? A Schnitzel.

Organisations are summaries of the past, not designs for the future.

-- Edward de Bono

Klassieke Musiek...

A Pirate

A pirate walks into a bar with a ship's wheel hanging from his crotch. The barman asks, and what is this? upon which the pirate answers, I do not know, but it's driving me nuts!

Mashed Potato & Pea Soup

What is the difference between Mashed Potato and Pea Soup? Everyone can mash potato, but not everyone can pee soup.

Cole's Law ....

Everyone knows Murphy's Law, but what is Cole's Law? Just finely chopped cabbage.

Awesome ....

Confucius say ...

It is only when a mosquito lands on your testicles that you realise there is allways a way to solve problems without using violence.

- Confucius

Religion is an attempt to survive the human condition

- Unknown

The real problem of humanity ...

The real problem of humanity is the following: we have paleolithic emotions, medieval institutions, and god-like technology. 

- E.O. Wilson

The bread rises in the yeast and sets in the waist - unknown

Ritholtz’s Law of AI

Ritholtz’s Law of AI

Our impatience grows exponentially with each step closer to functional machine learning and artificial intelligence

Bazinga

Wat is belangrik

Book Club Bouncer

Parenting...

An Honest Manager's Cheat Codes

A manager makes fire under your arse, but a leader makes fire in your heart.

When you run alone, you are quick, but when you run as part of a team, you run far - An African wisdom.

Humor goes a long way, even in tough times. 

Always hire people smarter than you.

Do not ever use your "power" as manager to make people do stuff, it only works once.

Culture eats strategy for breakfast - Peter Drucker.

Ask forgiveness, not permission.

Honesty is better than sugarcoated bullsh*t.

A group of flamingos is called a flamboyance

Pilot Lounge...

C++ Land